A Small Birthday Miracle Amidst the Pandemic

Posted On May 11, 2020

My 40^th birthday was on May 3, 2020. Being the obsessive planner and travel fanatic that I am, I planned my celebration trip almost a year in advance. Mexico City & Tulum, two places that have been very high on my wish list for a long time. It seems like EVERYONE has been going to Mexico City lately and coming back with rave reviews. All the things I love – great food, cheap prices, cute cafes. And Tulum… Some people say it has become too commercial but since I have no reference point of how it was years ago, I am quite sure I would love it, especially since Bali is one of my all-time favorite places and a lot of people make comparisons.

However, as all of us will probably remember for the rest of our lives, the spring of 2020 is when the COVID-19 pandemic changed everything. I was in Cuba when things really took a bad turn and we had to suspend the trip three days in and abruptly come back. The Shelter-in-Place order had just started in San Francisco the day before I got back. Needless to say, I had to cancel my birthday trip.

So instead of being in Mexico celebrating with cocktails and massages on the beach, I was sheltering in place alone. Many people (most people?) might find this depressing. But somehow it turned out to be a truly magical birthday and a reminder of how the small things can really bring incredible joy if you make the time and space to appreciate and savor them.

Backtracking a few weeks, I had lost my purse at the farmers market. The flow at farmers markets has been completely altered to meet social distancing guidelines and each week it seems different. Many routines that we previously did mostly without thinking are now confusing. So somehow in the chaos of trying to figure out what line was for which farmer, and trying to make sure I stood six feet away from other people, and remembering not to touch my face, etc, I apparently left my purse somewhere. Unfortunately I had JUST gone to the ATM machine so had $200 in there. DOH. I normally would never carry that much cash. What are the chances?! I tried messaging the farmers market on Facebook and they wrote back right away, but half an hour later said no one had turned it in. The week after, I tried to ask around with the farmers I had bought from, but I was coming up empty and didn’t have time to wait in ALL the same lines again so I didn’t make it to every farmer. I gave up hope and tried to tell myself whoever got the $200 probably needed it more than I did, so I should let it go. I ordered a new ATM card.

Now, back to my birthday by which point I had put the lost purse out of my mind (no point in dwelling on it). I was on a lovely WhatsApp video call with my cousins in India who called to wish me happy birthday when I got an incoming call and then text from my friend Jessica saying “see voicemail about your purse”. Whaaaat? How did Jessica know about this? It turns out a very kind farmer who found my purse had been trying to contact me; he had messaged me on Facebook but it somehow got filtered out since we weren’t connected. This farmer had my license out at the farmers market hoping someone would recognize me and let me know he had it. A very thoughtful person named Lisa offered to look me up on Facebook, saw that we had a mutual connection named Jon, so she called him, and he called our mutual friend Jessica, who called me. I was floored at the integrity of this farmer who was so committed to getting the purse back to me, as well as the kindness of all these different people who played a role in getting this message to me. I immediately ran over to the farmers market and was able to get it back. The farmer who brought it to me was someone I immediately recognized – I’ve been going to his stall almost every week for about 8 years. I realized I had never known his name after all these years! He recognized me as well from the driver’s license. What a wonderful human to spend weeks trying to get it back to me, and to get it on my birthday itself after losing hope – I was incredibly touched by the poignancy of how many small acts of kindness and thoughtfulness led to this. I call it my birthday miracle and special shout-out to Osbaldo, Lisa, Jon and Jessica for the part they each played in this.

I’m not one to organize a big Zoom call for myself with everyone I know, so I’d been assuming it would be a rather low-key birthday in terms of celebrating. A Zoom call with my immediate family and I thought that would be it. But there were so many other surprises that added up to an incredibly heart-warming day: my friend Kaytee who I was supposed to go to Mexico City with sent me a ton of thoughtful gifts that arrived on different days so it was like a flood of surprise gifts. My cousins had flowers hand-delivered! My sister sent me homemade mini cheesecakes with ALL my favorite things- peanut butter and chocolate combo with an oreo crumble. She also sent me the most thoughtful gift, the Embr Wave which is exactly what I need in my life! My cousin who lives in SF stopped by with her boyfriend to drop off an awesome goody bag of homemade cookies, donuts, and a bottle of Brut Rose- my favorite! My friend Jen brought me champagne for a social-distanced park celebration.  All these unexpected moments of generosity and thoughtfulness, along with the birthday miracle, brought me more happiness than a trip to Mexico.

It’s all how you look at it. On paper, I am turning 40, I’m single and alone and my trip was ruined by this pandemic. It could have been easy to feel bummed out about getting older and being alone on a milestone birthday. But somehow all my habits from over the years have rewired my mental patterns towards happiness – for the most part. It will be a lifelong journey but I feel like I have found some tools and practices that have helped me to be genuinely happy and joyful amidst difficult circumstances.

Have you had any small moments of joy or other silver linings during these tough times? The news can be heart-breaking so it helps to share uplifting stories. I’d love to hear from you, please leave a comment!